My mom has never been bashful about what a challenge I was to raise. I was stubborn, strongwilled, in your face and I never stopped talking. As I mentioned above, I was not a bad child. I never acted out maliciously, I was just a challenge to raise with such high spirits. The funny thing is, a few years ago I saw a report on one of those news magazines that having a child like that is actually very good when they become adults. In my case it was very true, all of those traits have definitely worked in my favor. I like to think I am quite a successful woman in many different areas of my life and what was once a challenge for my mom to deal with has turned out to be some of the main reasons I am successful.

However, I am now the mother of three boys that all have some degree of those traits, plus some of my husbands. My youngest, Shawn, has always been the most like me in almost every way. This weekend proved it. I have to give you a little warning…this is for all the parents out there! This story is a little gross, but absolutely hilarious. Many of you will be able to relate.

With all three of my boys, we have taken them out of the crib and put them in a toddler bed at 15 months old. We make sure the entire bedroom is child proof and put a lock on the door so they cannot get out of their room and fall down the stairs or get into any other trouble. We make sure they have plenty of books to read and toys to play with. We do this until they are ready to come out at night and go potty, about three or four years old. It has worked very well for the older two boys who are now five and seven. So, we followed suit with Shawn our three year old.

This past week we took the lock off of his door because he is ready to get rid of the Pullup at night. He has been potty trained during the day for over a year now and his bladder is about ready to go without Pullups at night. Well, he is still three, so he kept coming out of his room at insane hours and playing and making noise…enough to wake up his brothers. On Friday of last week I had had it. I had Matt put the lock back on his door. We talked to Shawn about why and said when he showed us he was ready again we would take the lock back off and try again. I showed him….right? Mama’s got this all under control…Or not.

Fast forward to Sunday morning, I walked into Shawn’s room for a second and thought I smelled something. Didn’t think much of it at the time. When I walked back in there, Matt was helping Shawn pick his clothes for the day. I started sniffing…I could smell something and it was not pleasant. Matt couldn’t smell anything because “his sniffer is broken”. I say to Matt, “Do you smell that? It smells like poop in here.” He doesn’t smell anything. I start sniffing around the room and asking Shawn if he had pooped in his room. I look over at him and his eyes are as big as saucers and he says, “NO”. There was an Elmo chair knocked over and I kick it out of the way…I am on a mission now. Something smells like poop in this room and I am going to find it.

As I am sniffing around Matt and I are grilling Shawn and he is assuring us that he did not do anything. All the while I can tell by his little face he did. Finally, I stop, look at Matt and say, “There is a steaming pile of poop in here somewhere. We just have to find it.” Finally Shawn starts fumbling over his words saying, “I had to go potty and I couldn’t get out!” We gently ask him where it is and he walks over and moves his big 4X4 Jeep which was sitting over it. Yes, he had pooped on his carpet.

Matt and I started laughing so hard! Matt composed himself quite quickly and started telling Shawn that was not a good idea and got to cleaning up the mess. I, however, had to leave the room. I was hysterically laughing. I walked out of the room and into my bedroom and closed the door. I picked up the phone and called my mom. I was laughing so hard she could barely understand a word I said. The first words I spoke were, “There is no denying Shawn is my son!” I proceeded to tell her the story through laughter and tears. I had to repeat myself several times because I think only dogs could understand me with my shrieks of laughter.

Now, I want to make something very clear. I would have never done what Shawn did. However, the reason I saw that mirror clear as day was because of his gumption. I have always been the type that if someone thought they had shown me, I would turn around and show them.

Believe it or not, there is a very important lesson Shawn taught me that day other than the fact that laughing that hard is a good workout. People are going to knock you down. You may want something really bad and someone is going to tell you you are not ready or you can’t handle that yet. You have to pick yourself up and prove them wrong. I am not sure Shawn went the best route at doing that, but I will tell you, we are not locking the door any more and he has been much better about coming out when he is not supposed to. Don’t let people stifle your dreams. When someone tries to block you, figure out another way around it. You have to be persistent. If there is no way around them, find a way to persuade them to your side. You would be amazed at what you can do if you just try.

Thank you Shawn for that wonderful lesson. You are such an amazing teacher at three years old.

I believe it was September when I actually realized my mojo was missing. I was having dinner with some girlfriends and we started discussing it. I started thinking about myself back in high school and college. I just presented myself different. According to my husband, I walked with a strut (he later explained it to be that I walked with a purpose). In other words, I am going somewhere, move out of my way. I was never malicious or mean to anyone, that is just not my style. But, I knew what I was doing, where I was going and no one had better get in my way or I would let them know about it. It definitely got me in some hot water when I was younger, because insecure people would try to bring me down. But, I never wavered. My method of operation was to feel the sting, cry (just a little bit) and then get really ticked off. That was when I would turn into a bulldozer. It was like, “Oh, you don’t think I can do this? Well, let me show you how wrong you are!” I did it in college with difficult professors, I did it at the beginning of my career with difficult Seniors and Managers. I LOVED proving them wrong.

Then, I had my first son and I was thrown into a tailspin. Anyone that has ever had children knows the tailspin I am talking about. Suddenly, I don’t have complete control anymore, I can’t just “prove him wrong” to make myself feel better. Things weren’t nearly as cut and dry. Also, finances became much more complicated. Budgeting was more difficult, there was a lot more to think about. And, to top it all off, I had this little man completely depending on me. Wow, that will rock your world. Now, I don’t want to completely bore you with all the things that have beaten me down over the last eight years, but I am sure you understand. Life has taken my mojo away. It is still there, somewhere, it is just hiding from me.

I can see now, the consequences have been significant. I feel like I have become this totally wimpy victim. With that, comes blaming others for my situation. Whether it is dealing with the down economy or dealing with difficult clients. I haven’t had the same fire lit up under me. Well, that has all changed. Whenever I feel my shoulders slump, I immediately put them back. Every time I start to see that wimpy Kristi come back, I immediately think of that feisty girl I used to be. I am slowly, but surely, bringing her back. There is no longer a victim here. I own it! I know who I am and what I am here to do. Okay Universe, watch out, Kristi’s got her mojo back!

Dictionary.com defines focus as “a central point, as of attraction, attention, or activity.” I love this word because it is my new best friend. I have always been one that was focused. For goodness sake, I made the decision to do accounting when I was fifteen. From what I understand, not many teenagers do that, and stick with it. The fact of the matter is, I love numbers. I have always loved numbers…they speak to me. And, honestly, they speak to me now more than ever.

When you are in school, your life is mapped out for you. When you finish first grade, you go to second and so on. After you graduate from high school, there are some variations, but overall, your life is still pretty mapped out for you if you go the college route. Once you make your decision about your major, they give you a list of classes and prerequisites and guide you through the maze.

In my field of accounting, again, there are variations, but overall your life is still mapped out for you depending on your goals. Mine was to get licensed as a Certified Public Accountant, so I followed that route.

But, then I had children. My focus was taken so far off course, it has taken me almost eight years to get back in focus. The good news is, I figured out this morning that this  mama is focused again! I know what I want and I don’t plan on letting anything get in my way.

Focus is such an amazing gift. While you may have life’s challenges take you off course, focus is what helps you get back on track. For years I really was not sure what I wanted. I had these three absolutely perfect little boys. I was so worried I was not spending enough time with them or being a good enough mom. I wanted clients, but I wanted to spend time with my boys. I wanted more money, but I didn’t want to work too much.

Now, I understand that the best gift I can give my boys is a happy and successful mom. With that decision made, I have been able to focus on my business more than ever while still being the best mom I can be. I have the Black Eyed Peas song “Let’s Get it Started” running through my head because even though I have had my business for over five years, I almost feel like I am just now really lifting off.

I am so excited because I feel like I have just given birth to my fourth baby. I cannot wait to see what this year has in store for me now with my new found focus.